Saturday, September 4, 2010
We [me and a specific 'you'] used to spend these nights sitting under the canopy, you lying on the couch and me lounging in the chair. Or out on one of our driveways, laying and looking up at the stars. We'd talk about anything and everything- the universe seemed an open book, at peace. Those were the truly the days.
I'm in one of those moods where I really wish I could snap to songs, but, sadly, I don't know how to snap. :P
It's like this: I really wanna talk to [another, different, specific] you, but my shyness is just as stifling as yours. That's sadly how it always goes for me, but it's a part of my life that I just can't change just yet. It's ironic, how similar we are, yet our similarities makes us separate.
I've been feeling specifically lonely [why do lonely and lovely look alike?] this week. With my plethera of homework and PSAT practice-testing, I haven't been updating [or reading (or commenting)] as much lately. Erg. I apologize, I guess.
That, and my morning routine is a lonely path. When I walk alone through the halls, everyone stares at me like I don't belong. The truth is, I honestly do belong- I just can't push myself into the crowd and become one with the groups of people. The part of me that belonged in this school is a thing of the past, and I miss it so. My silent loneliness bears the memory so well, yet I feel stronger, because I still continue to exist, even if invisible, after the greatest times.
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.
Off-topic remark: My backpack is killing me. Seriously. I need to work out the twigs I call arms, because they seriously hurt from carrying so much. So much that my friends make fun of me by saying different things about it. Oh, you could carry a dead body in there. That weighs as much as you do! AND SO ON.
Dirk ['my best fran'] comes back tonight. Not that I'll see him tonight, because we're both tired as those cute little animals sleeping in those pictures, but still: he's bah-ack. :]
*To tell you the truth, I did see him. That's why this wasn't published yesterday, because I was outside 'til early in the morning. We sat under our canopy and talked about our lives, just like the old days.
P.S. Listen to THIS. This awesome blogger who goes by Kay [personally one of my favorite top-notch awesome bloggers on here] picked it out for me, and it's an absolutely fantastic song. :]