Thursday, October 27, 2011

To tell you the truth, all, I am very, very content with life.

I attended one of my friend's birthday parties this past weekend, and it was oh-so-very lovely. It wasn't even that it was fall (although that did exponentially make it more beautiful), but it was also being surrounded by some of my closest, dearly-missed friends (good friends I haven't seen in over two months). The bonfire, the crazy dancing, the chili, the chocolate cookies, the conversations about Harry Potter, the Ale-8: I truly feel like those things define me and my happiness.

Yet the most beautiful moment came in the following morning. We had stayed up until 4:00 a.m. or so, but for some reason I woke up several hours later, when the sunlight was just beginning to pour through the windows. I laid there for quite awhile, wandering in a lazy unconsciousness, but then I noticed it. I was home. Laying there, surrounded by some of the people I truly love, I was home.

"Home is wherever I'm with you..."

Oh, this feeling is warm and fuzzy, it is just so enlightening. It is especially helping in making it through the whirlwind of stress I am currently facing. College applications & Calculus, oh my!

On the college application I am currently working on, I have to write about a situation that has "piqued my intellectual curiosity." The thing is, I truly don't know what I am "intellectually curious" about in the first place- I mean, I am curious about things, but I don't feel like I have necessarily been "piqued" by one specific incident for any of them. I feel like, rather, my curiosity has developed overtime with my life and experiences, as well as how I determine and truly engage in something I am interested in. I know that they just wish to see in an applicant their ability to analyze in retrospect their own lives, but it is pretty intense. So, if you have any comments about something in your life that has piqued your intellectual curiosity, PLEASE share!


Friday, October 14, 2011

strive along

breathe in
breathe out
let the stars themselves sprout
don't you know to love them so?
the life, inside
the beaten hide
while lives of all must grow
and so we lay
on their remains
in hopes of seeing the next day
but we must hope
in being strong
to shine so bright
and strive along.

(I'm still tinkering with it.)

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

*new blog name alert.

(even though it will probably be transient.)

Saturday, October 1, 2011

The Sensation of Leaving

*Sorry, everyone, for being gone. Life has gotten in the way, and I really am slightly saddened that everyone can understand that. College visits and piles of homework have taken up all of my time... and focus... and energy. So I'm trying to make up for it, kind of. Not that I really need to. You all understand my ways- I don't need to explain myself. You probably understand me to a larger extent than I myself do.


One of my most favorite sensations in the world is watching the highway zoom by- going forward in one direction. It's when you go away. Those long car rides are hours spent well in the deep realm of thought. It is a way of escape- and I'm not talking about the feeling of the stuffy hotel duvets and that one damn bright streetlight that creeps in through the tiniest crack in the curtains. I wrote a personal narrative on a trip, on this feeling, oh-so long ago, but I could never place it for what it truly was.

I really enjoyed the sensation of not feeling "away" while I was away, two weeks ago, to Tennessee. As I traveled across the county lines, I still felt at home in the world- in myself- in that I carried my "home" with me. It came in the form of friends, good friends- ones I had not seen in so long, yet I still carried their heavy, happy memories in my heart.

On my way home from the city, escaping smoke-filled air and cramped highways, all I could gaze at were the stars shimmering in the sky. Hours whizzed by like the passing landscape and streetlights, but the stars were there all along, along for the same ride I was. The couple sitting beside me was tangled in one another, arms and legs mixed in the midst of summer, but I smiled and had my own intimate conversation with the stars. Indeed, a conversation with the very own heavens that hold all of our dreams, our loves. Those bodies, shining bright!

(I'm going to end this post now, as I have a small, cutesy, pretty lame story about my experience with the stars. Actually, I think I could write a hundred poems, a thousand stories, and a million love songs about the stars. I'm obsessed, you know.)

Mack. :)
"... I try to make buildings that feel good to be in. Like this. C'mere."

Max took a step toward him. Carol suddenly enveloped Max in a bear hug.

"What's that feel like?"

"Ummm, hairy? Warm. Good."

"Yeah. I want to build a whole world like that."