Wednesday, April 17, 2013

it's a love story

I do not like those people that say that without God, they are nothing. That is really inaccurate, seeing as there are many people on this Earth who live without believing or caring about God, and some in the most remote of areas live without ever even hearing of God. Saying that they are nothing says that their lives are meaningless, are value-less, are nothing, and I just feel that that is offensive and not true.

I think it would be much easier to say that with God, I am something beyond what I could have ever hoped. With God, I can accomplish many things (but because I love him so much, they should glorify Him, rather than myself), and He gives me strength to do these things. I find more purpose, more meaning to my small life walking in Jesus' footsteps, than I could have possibly found before. It's feeling full in life, it's a calling- a hope- that I can actually chase and never be let down because my shortcomings are not important, but just that I keep chasing and that what I am chasing is so important. It is a hope and joy that seems to pour into my thoughts and my writing, as it is below.


For a very long time, I thought no one could love me. My heart yearned for love, but it seemed to be guarded by the "evil stepmother" of my bushy eyebrows, my fat chin, and my shapeless hair. Within the jungle of my body sat a heart that ached in the depth of loneliness. I looked through every nook and cranny of every place I went (and I even went to different countries), but found nothing even close to what I was looking for. I thought I found love in the form of a nice boy who was green and red at the same time, but only found myself carrying his same burden on my own shoulders, dealing with it on my own late in the hours of the night, every night.

But then, I finally let Him in. We have been seeing each other, "talking," you know, for a little under a year now, and I have found that a relationship with Him is the most beautiful, perfect kind of love I could hope to find anywhere. And no, it was never on Earth- I just never even considered to look up. I still find myself falling more and more in love with Him and what He has done and continues to do in my life and in the lives of others.

P.S. I feel like more people are beginning to fall in love with me. I feel new friendships forming, old ones becoming refreshed, and a happiness and hope that cannot be matched. But I just wish I could tell them all that when they are falling in love with me, they are falling in love with what God is doing in my life and in my heart. Times are a-changing, and I am choosing to follow the clouds and the sky with all my heart. I just hope that my trials, experiences, and successes can glorify Him and allow people to open up their hearts with a crack just big enough for God to squeeze in.

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